Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
Randomize
