Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
Randomize
