I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Randomize
