Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
One good thing about being a mom now, I can tell which guys I'm dating were breastfed and which weren't... By the way they latch on to my breast during sex! Kinda kills the mood.
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
Randomize
