I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.
I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
Apparently, the Mormons have taken over airports. I was told by a befuddled looking clerk I couldn't buy a beer with breakfast before 6am.
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
