do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
Randomize
