...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
75% of the time I swipe right on Bumble for girls over 40 is because I think their 18 year old daughter is hot.
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
I JUST PETTED A FUCKING SQUIRREL. A SQUIRREL.
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
Randomize
