We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize
