I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
I told my fuck buddy that I wanted one of his arms to take home with me to hold onto in bed and he was hurt that I didn't want to bring him, like as a person, home to my family. I feel like you and only you could appreciate this.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
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