do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
How to not get laid: tell him he reminds you of your brother. While having sex. Thanks, vodka.
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
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