I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
Randomize
