i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
When I woke up I had three missed calls from the name 'dream krystals'.... If I remember correctly she was the lady at the drive thru at Krystals and her name was Dream.. She wanted to come to the strip club with us... Do you remember?
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
New definition for "rock bottom": Waking up in a puddle of your own puke, missing your fake tooth. Then having to dig through said puddle of puke for aforementioned fake tooth. Think it's time I quit partying so hard.
Is this your way of breaking up with me as my wingman?
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
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