So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
Randomize
