The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
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