Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone.
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
Randomize