Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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