it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
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