They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
Randomize
