Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
I almost had sex at the fire station last night and I need you to acknowledge all the awesomeness that is in that sentence.
Couch. On fire.
Randomize
