That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
I woke up this morning to 4 booty call texts. So i am trying to find the sign that says i like to sit on cocks so that i can take it off.
trust me, i wonder where that sign is on a daily basis.
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
Randomize
