O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
After last night, I think I need a service animal to monitor the life choices I make when I'm inebriated. A monkey, or a clever dog. Or a really assertive parrot.
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
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