I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
Randomize
