Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
his mom walked in while I was blowing him. he turned around in panic and accidentally punched me in the face. i have a black eye and only half the clothes i came here in. can you give me a ride?
i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
Randomize
