he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
Whenever I'm hungover I try to stay in public as much as possible, hoping to be a cautionary tale to children. It's a public service, really.
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
Randomize
