Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
FYI, your girlfriend is on her way to the ER. She tried to balance a bottle of jack on her chest. Smashed toes, blood all over patio. Call her, kinda funny though.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
The Russian stripper asked if I like foreign girls. I told her I absolutely fucking hate accents. Most awkward 7 minutes ever
Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
Randomize
