The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
I microwaved pizza rolls, a hot dog, and bacon in the same plate with no paper towels. I drank the grease at the end. I'm going to vomit everywhere.
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
Smuggling a beer bottle full of vodka out of the bar with a tampon as a plug for the top of the bottle wasn't one of my classiest ideas... but your hangover proves it was resourceful and effective. Your welcome.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
Randomize
