Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
Randomize
