he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
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