yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
Just got a blowjob from a coed in exchange for saving her an iPhone 5 when I get them in stock. Sometimes it's awesome to be a Verizon employee.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
My girlfriend is talking to my ex-boyfriend at the bar right now. I REPEAT, GIRLFRIEND IS TALKING TO EX BOYFRIEND RIGHT NOW. GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF THIS PLAACE
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
So I "accidentally" brought my road beers into church for this wedding
And they fell out of my pocket on the pew. Made quite a noise...safe to say I'm batting a thousand
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