she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
My phone now knows what I type and it prompts me with frequently used words. And anytime I use "and" and hit the space key two of the words are "unicorn" and "sausage"
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
The cat's telling me to stop taking acid, and to start doing the lords work. I'm almost 99% sure he's talking about the dark lord.
THIS CAT'S GOING TO TURN INTO A SNAKE AND KILL ME! GET OVER HERE NOW! BRING YOUR WAND.
Randomize
