the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
Randomize
