Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
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