You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
Randomize