you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
It came up in court that I told the arresting officer my name was Thomas Jefferson, and I was born in 1776. I almost kept a straight face. Almost.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
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