'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
did i just pee glitter
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