Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
Randomize
