I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
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