if i die, you can have my worn out liver and american apparel deep v's.sell the liver to a chinese restaurant
He disabled his match.com account in front of me
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
Randomize
