Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
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