she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
You were up on table in a neon bra chanting "YOUR MOM" while drizzling vodka on your chest...
no wonder i woke up with my boobs stuck to my bra
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
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