Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
Randomize
