I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
My boob is missing a layer of skin
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
Listen, I booty called my boss last night from the company phone. I may need to brush up my resume.
Never joke about your clitoris.
i just woke up from a 4 hour nap, still drunk, to make mac n cheese.
Randomize
