I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
third nipple confirmed
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
Randomize
