You're so nebulous sometimes
She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
and the officer said have you been drinking
and i said NOO SIR.
and he said, I am a woman.
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
just because you dressed up as a brontosaurus doesn't mean you can poop in my yard and roar at my neighbors
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
New rule: if someone asks if you would like to snort a xanax the answer is no.
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
Randomize
