I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
The greatest thing of my life happened today. I took a shit and it formed a smiley face. It's going to be a fucking fantastic day.
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
Hey, remember that girl at rocklobster you thought was hot but were to pussy to talk to? You were right, her boobs are fake and she gives the best head on the planet. Can you come pick me up?
You're dead to me.
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
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