can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila.
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
did you just send me my own nude
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
Randomize
