im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?
Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine
drunken problem solving at its finest
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
Randomize
