fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
i just thanked the atm machine for giving me cash
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
He got in a fight. Then called me drunk to see if he should bail his friends out, or walk through a Taco Bell drive-thru. True love.
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
Randomize
