I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
I need hand sanitizer and jesus.
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
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