Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
apparently i'm not the first person wake up and realize she's ugly cuz i tore this house apart and there is no sign of my clothes
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
im just laying here pukin in my mouth and swallowing it 'cause im WAY too lazy to actually get up and find a place to vomit. this is my life now.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
Remember that time you bought snap bracelets on Amazon and they sent you 300 pregnancy tests instead? Amazon knows.
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
Randomize
